It's all set.
I ordered an ironing board from Amazon.com as a gag, and gift-wrapped the box. It's leaned up against the wall, six feet tall, and she's been going nuts trying to figure out what it is.
Then, I bought a
gag gift box that looks like a family-sized Snuggie. I wrapped the Smith in a blue blanket, put it in the box, and gift-wrapped it.
Finally, I took the little keys that came with the revolver -- which we will never use -- and put them in a jewelry box.
I figure she's going to open the ironing board, and (hopefully) realize it's a gag.
Then, I'll give her the jewelry box. When she opens it and says ""are you serious?"?!?!?" I'll tell her that they are titanium nipple rings.
Finally, she'll open the gag box. I'll make sure there's no actual ammunition in the room.